There is a simultaneous glow from both the cordless house phones and the small vonage box in the corner of the room; thus signaling me of yet another setback in my struggle to unleash my new found creativity. Slowly my head sinks to my computer desk and I lightly whisper, “There is something in the cosmos that wants me to fail.” Without missing a beat, my husband jumps up to reset the internet connection while I contemplate an early retirement from a task that is only 4 hours old.
I have yet to get truly started an already, I have had 9 interruptions…from an infant in search of breast-milk; a toddler with a ‘less-than-fresh’ diaper; attention seeking pre-teens and a slew of household chores… I figured that the inclement weather would provide a convenience opportunity to stay in and be productive. However, I forgot the most important thing about working at home with family…They’re not locked in here with me… I’m locked in here with them! So… with a clothes-pin over my nose, I change the toddler and figure that the infant seeking the breast-feeding session is nature’s way of forcing me to sit down and refigure the design of my website and blog…yet again…
So, the internet continues to jump in and out of service like some funky communications double-dutch game…and I figure that I might want to include a more streamline design to my site… (not because I want it easier to use, but because I want to be able to design it, program it, and have it done before anymore interruptions take shape.) However if I am at all going to try and prove to the world that I know what I am doing, web-wise, then a savvy and more innovative design is in order…but that means that I am going to have to take my time, seek a quiet meditation spot, and really hack out something good! Perhaps the bathroom! (No not design the bathroom…go in it… to think, use..., hide…maybe all three!)
So with inspiration streaking through me like a bowl of baked beans through a baby, I sit in the tub an draw a flowchart of the links and pages I want to feature on the site. This time around, I figure that I need to come correct with my thoughts and feelings about the client experiences I face and the hardships I go through as a small time freelance designer. I know I’m not the best in the world…and my self esteem and sense of pride prevent me from feeling like the worst… so I figure that my placement in the design field has the potential to teach some…and probably amuse other… for everyone else…
“Fuck’em!’ my husband proclaims… “oh you can’t say fuck’em…can you?...well fuck that…” (He said that as I read to him this blog before I posted it…LOL)
My husband knocks on the door to remind me that pre-teens need to get ready for bed to go to school tomorrow. I venture downstairs to find that the cosmos agreed with my changes and overall sense of internet purpose… the infant and toddler are asleep in a crumpled heap in the corner, the dishwasher is running with a load of dishes, and the internet is back on. Thank God for small favors…now back to the website and blog… 
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